As pretty as her mommy…

She did this herself at her very first slumber party.

She thinks she looks beautiful.

“Look Mommy, I look just like you now.”

Maybe I should look in the mirror before I leave the house from now on.

Let’s just bring it right out into the open…

Because my daughter has been spreading it all over town anyway.

Bailey loves a word that I want to die every time I hear it. You may not know, but I was raised in a very reserved family. There were just certain words that we were never, ever allowed to say. My parents referred to them as vulgarities. I remember the first time I said the word “butt” in reference to my sit-upon. My mom freaked. Majorly. Got onto me in front of all my friends. That’s just hard to handle when you are 17.

The new word in our vocab is much worse than the word for tush. (See, I can’t even say that one again!)

There is a certain way we talk in our house. I know I’ve said it a time or two on this blog, but my goodness, I am an adult. But I never say it around my kiddos. Certainly not in a way that would encourage them to think it is something fun to say.

So you can imagine my shock when Bailey added a word to her vocabulary.

She was so sweet. Sitting there in her pigtails. Singing mommy a song.

It was the first song she’s ever made up. I’ll cherish it forever.

“Pup-py. Pup-py. Puppy puppy puppy.”

She smiled at me.

And at the top of her lungs.

“Puppy goes POOOOOOOP!”

With that, she lifted her tush in the air and made a raspberry sound.

Then died laughing. I mean, rolled onto the ground laughing. Came over and put her hand on my knee as if to say, “get it, Mom? It’s funny!”

Later that evening, she thought it would be funny to hold things behind her and drop them. Then say she pooped them.

“Look, Mommy, I poop it. I poop it.”

Laughing and rolling around on the floor like she is the funniest person alive.

Since then, every song she sings has poop in it.

Jesus loves poop. The people on the bus go poop. Five little monkeys pooping on my bed.

And my all time favorite. Just when I almost had her to sleep last night. In a teeny, tiny little voice I hear.

“Rock-a-bye. Rock-a-bye. Rock-a-bye Poooooooop.”

She laughed so hard, she rolled off her bed.

Just because my life is filled with poop, I don’t think we need to sing about it all the time. Apparently I’m wrong. And actually, it’s starting to become funny. But don’t tell anyone I said that.

Lights, Rides, Animals and Sticky Fall Goodness!

Ah. The crispness of the autumn air is filled with the sounds of bleating sheep and bawling steers. Well, until you get on the midway, then it’s filled with the cries of the carnival barkers and the music from a million rides.

That’s right, it’s fair time.

Tulsa State Fair started last week. So we all loaded up and headed East for an afternoon of fair going.

Now the Fair is this odd combination of animals, homesteading exhibits and general chaos. I am convinced that it was a perfectly lovely experience, until someone had the idea to start selling fried foods on sticks and luring kiddos to the carnival rides.

The Cowboy and I are perfectly happy watching the animals and looking through the 4-H and FFA Exhibits.

But, we went and had kiddos. And the midway draws them right in.

So we spent a few minutes with the petting zoo.

All the poor little animals had been force fed copious amounts of feed all day long by happy little kiddos. They were no longer hungry for $5 cups of feed. Which led to lots of parents giving away the feed (which is how we got ours and how we passed it off on someone else!).

Bailey gave up on the feeding and was trying to get over the fence to ride a goat. I was honestly surprised that she was the only one who thought of this.

Dally found a little lazy goat and hand fed him. Lucky goat, he didn’t even have to get up. I would have brought him home with me, but the Cowboy had already threatened to divorce me over the alpaca. And he just walked off mumbling when I scratched ears on a lovely little kangaroo.

We tried to watch some livestock shows, but felt so bad for the people around us. They had to listen to both girls whine about “the rides, the rides, Momma, Daddy, the rides.”

So we stuffed their bellies full of fried foods on a stick. The expressions on their faces say it all! It occurred to me that they probably have never eaten fried foods on sticks before.

They both ate those entire foot-long corn dogs. Then we dragged them up and down the midway until it was dark. The cowboy let them play several games and win lots of stuffed animals that were in desperate need of a home.

We finally decided on the Merry-Go-Round. You see, after the parking, entrance fee, large amounts of fried foods, etc, I figured we had spent at least $100. I was not going to spend another $100 on rides. So we all had to agree on one ride to ride as a family.

The kiddos waited patiently in line. They were more well behaved than they’ve ever been in their whole lives. Little hands handed over tickets. The Cowboy led us around the entire cavvy of brightly painted horses, because “you have to pick the perfect horse.”

We chose…

Bailey's

Dally’s

And we were off!

They galloped, they giggled and they begged for us to buy them their own Merry-G0-Round. There aren’t any great pictures of them riding around and around, because Mommy had a hard time holding on, standing upright and keeping her fried foods on a stick down.

My name is Lily. And I get sick on the Merry-Go-Round.

And in our search to end the evening in a perfect way, we encountered the most fall of all creations: Caramel Apples.

Yummy, gooey Caramel Apples.

How do you improve the stickiness of this perfect treat?

Roll it in M&M’s! Ahhhh. Sticky goodness, combined with chocolate goodness! She didn’t even know there was an apple inside.

It was impossible to eat without your face becoming covered with blue and green and sticky stuff.

After a while, she gave up and was content to watch Mommy try to eat that M&M monster! There is no way to eat one of those quickly while walking through a crowd of fair-goers. The cowboy tried and an M&M flew off and hit a guy in the side of the head.

Thank goodness Dally chose sprinkles!

In case you’re wondering, the kiddos chewed and chomped and got sticky, but never finished either of these treats. The Cowboy and I then took over, but never finished them either! They were the amazing, never ending treat. My suggestion? Buy the Caramel Apples first and it will be a fairly quiet animal viewing experience. Just a bit sticky. But then again, when are things not sticky around here?

Catching up…it’s all I ever do!

I’ve become a very baaaad blogger. I swear, I just posted the other day….right? At least in the past week? MONTH?

Well, darn it….I’m just so swamped.

But I promise you I’m back.

A little blonder (thanks to Amanda at the Parlour).

But I’m back.

So here’s some pics of what we’ve been doing lately.

We dyed eggs. Which is fun when you are five years old….

But is not that exciting when you are two!

Then we searched for those sneaky eggs. You have to run really fast to do this.

And check out that stylish dress Dally’s wearing…um, did I mention I made it?

Unless you are two years old…Then you wonder around wondering why you never noticed all the candy-filled eggs in the grass before.

This morning, I caught her looking under the big tulip leaves in the flower bed….I know what she was looking for!

We’ve worked a lot in our flower beds and veggie garden….what’s my secret, you ask?

First, go to Lowes and buy 800 lbs of manure. (I know, I know, I live on a ranch…we have plenty of free manure if you want to pick it up. I might have the want, don’t have the time!) Then bring it home. Have a cowboy smirk at you and ask how you plan to get it all out of the truck and into the garden. Threaten to throw manure at him. Spend four hours getting the manure into the garden beds. Go take a bubble bath and eat an entire package of oreos.

Simple, huh?

Check out these precious little pettiskirts….I call them –

My pretty little princess ballerina!

And –

My little rocker ballerina!!!

Okay, I’ll be back again later….and if it’s sooner, we’ll just consider that a surprise!

I knew it would happen someday, but am still shocked….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wow. I knew this day would come someday. But I sure didn’t expect it to come so very soon.

I mean….the kiddos are ONLY four and two. I thought we were ten years out from this day.

 

But this morning, when I got up…..

They were dressed. Sitting at the kitchen table. Eating breakfast……

 

 

And watching a cartoon on tv.

All…by….themselves.

I started to ask Dally if Daddy had gotten up to help them…..but Bailey looked at me, put her little finger over her mouth and said “SHHHHHH, Mommy sleeping.”

 

I was so shocked by this that I had to sneak back to our bedroom, wake the cowboy up and tell him.

His take on the whole thing: Um, babe….they’ve probably really messed something up and you just haven’t seen it yet.

Thanks. Nice. Now I’m paranoid. I double checked the inside of my snow boot before I put it on….it’s a favorite place for mashed bananas to hide.

But for now, I’m going to assume they just really want to go sledding again!

As soon as the cowboy wakes up, he’s going to have to install that buzzer gadget on their door. I mean, he could be right about the mess I just haven’t found yet. I’m not taking any more chances.

After all, getting to sleep in one morning every decade is enough….right?

Hello?

Recharging my mommy battery!

I love my kiddos. No, really. I do. Despite the fact that I’ve had three eyeshadows, one eyeliner, a new mascara and fifteen tubes of lip gloss all destroyed. I love them.

Despite the bendaroos stuck to the bottom of my slippers. I love them.

Despite the rice crispies that are all over the kitchen table and floor right now. I love them.

Despite the messy room, the pee pee in my seat in the truck yesterday (oh, not something you want to find out about after you sit down) and the pee pee in the recliner last night. I love them.

And toughest of all — despite the fact that when I got the Oreo package off the top of the fridge and found there was no oreos inside the brand new package….I love them.

Because, sometimes. Every once in a while…….

They actually play nice. Together. That’s right….no fighting….no crying….no whining!

For at least fifteen minutes. But that fifteen minutes is all I need to recharge my mommy battery. And sneak into the kitchen to eat a rice crispie treat, which suprisingly is almost as good as an oreo.

And prepare myself for the next disaster!

Ring around the tub!

If you get your kiddo out of the tub, then return to find this…..

Then you know that either the kiddo in question was really, really filthy…

Or had been painted and made up by her older sister.

Yep, that was my mascara. Brand new….

At least it came off easily.

Now I need to clean my tub. Seriously, I could start an entire blog about the things kids put on their faces…or each other’s faces. This was all Dally’s doing. Sissy just went along with it!

When you want that minty fresh feeling…..

Maybe it’s because the kiddos are tired of being stuck in the house. When it dips below freezing, I don’t let them play outside….okay, call me a good mom if you must.

But since Christmas, it has looked like this outside:

Maybe the kiddos have gone snow crazy. That’s the only way I can explain the massive trouble they’ve been getting into over the past few days.

First, Dally hid all the yogurt in her room so that she could have a snack whenever she wanted. Then, she got a step ladder and got on top of the icebox and stole my oreos. And licked them clean, leaving piles of cookies hidden under her bed. Then she dumped two cups full of sugar in her floor so that she could have snow inside the house.

Oh, yeah. She hasn’t watched tv since.

Last Saturday, I had to move firewood onto the front porch. I would carry a load or two, then peak in the front window and check on the girls. Well, I got busy talking to a neighbor and about four minutes passed by before I checked on the little monsters again.

Somehow. Somewhere. Certainly never where I’ve looked when I’ve needed it…they found the one Sharpie marker we own.

And went to town with it.

She only has a few whiskers on both sides of her face. Unlike her sister….

Who, with help from big sis, became a full blown kitty cat. Oh, and check out the earrings she’s rocking too. All compliments of that one Sharpie marker.

Yeah, I freaked out. Where is the marker? Bring me the marker, right now! RIGHT NOW!

But, even I have to admit. It’s kinda cute.

So I did a search to find out what gets Sharpie marker off little baby skin. You would be surprised what some people suggest. Um, anything that I keep locked up was automatically outruled.

Baby oil. Well, that could work. And we didn’t have any.

So I just washed as much off as I could and we went to wally world the next morning to buy baby oil.

That evening, well, I got busy re-organizing the homeschool cabinet. And don’t you know, Bailey and Dally took it in their own hands to remove that Sharpie from Bailey’s precious little face. I walked around the loveseat in the living room to find a very….

well….

minty….

little girl.

Yep. That’s Crest extra-whitening right there. And she was covered in it. Extra-minty I’d say.

It took the rest of the sharpie off. But I wouldn’t recommend using it. It also irritated her skin. She probably won’t go anywhere near toothpaste again for a while. At least not the mint flavored.

And it still hasn’t ended. This morning, she ate a Burt’s Bees lip balm. Yeah. She’s still a bit minty fresh.

I can’t wait til spring.

Oh, please don’t let that be poop

If you are a mom, I guarantee that you have probably thought that thought.

Maybe even more than once.

When Dally was two, she was the queen of getting out of her diaper and pooping in odd places. Like on one of the window seats in the living room. 

Or on the kitchen table. Right in the middle of it.

That’s the reason for rule number three around here. No poop on the table.

Oh, gosh. What has happened to my life? I’m blogging about poop.

Now Bailey usually keeps her poop in her diaper. And the bathtub. Our tub has never seen so many cleanings. However, Bailey has a condition that gives her explosive bouts of diarrhea. Oh yeah.

They haven’t made a diaper that can hold it all in.

So you can understand why my mind was screaming, “Oh, please don’t let that be poop!” when I looked in Dally’s room the other evening and found this —

Um, I freaked out a bit.

Went a little closer. Smelled chocolate and…..cherries?

Apparently, she’d gotten into her dad’s chocolate covered cherries and gorged herself till she fell asleep. Still clutching the chocolate covered cherries.

Which melted.

And were smeared all over her. Her bed. Her face. Ick.

Well, at least it wasn’t poop.

My little ballerina

Dally still wants to be a cowboy when she grows up. However, that has been modified a bit.

She now wants to be a cowboy ballerina. Or a princess.

I told her that she could always be a princess like her Mommy. She said, “Mommy, you’re not a princess. You are a cowboy.”

I think she’s been talking with her dad.

She had her first ballet recital last Thursday. It was precious. She insisted on wearing makeup and having Mommy curl her hair. Look at how grown up my little kiddo is…

We had a great time getting her ready. Before it started, she was a little nervous.

But she did great.

She twirled.

Um, arabesque anyone?

I’m so very proud!